Levi Wars: EPISODE LLLLLXI: The Fourth Wall

THE MOST LOVED PRODUCTION COMPANY ON THE PLANET presents

a LEVITICUS production

a Levi Timothy Craig film

LEVI WARS

EPISODE LLLLLXI: The Fourth Wall

STARRING

Leviticus as himself

Chad Evans as Emperor God

Lexi as Darth Emperor’s Bitch

A Really Short Person as R2Mr.D2

Casting Director: Random Homeless Dude

Music Composer: Some guy who smells bad

Costume Designer: Kennedy Street’s Cousin’s, Brother’s, Best Friend’s Roomate

Associate Producers: Some guy from Canada

Editors: You

Production Designer: Jason Helms in a Bear Costume

Director of Photography: That Guy Who Got Arrested For Stalking Last Week

Executive Producer: The Green Ranger

Producer: Yo Momma

Writers: Roger Goodell

Director: Not Me

Our hero, The Most Loved Jedi In The Galaxy, is walking around the set of the film...oh wait, we're supposed to pretend this is real...crap...uh, our hero is walking around the planetary killing machine space station known as The SCW Star.  He is not alone!  He is accompanied by his trusty robot friend, R2Mr.D2

Leviticus: I sense a strange disturbance in the force!

R2Mr.D2: BEEP! BEEP! BOOP! BEEP!

Leviticus: No, I...well,I suppose it could be that burrito I ate...

He stops to sniff the air for a moment and nods his head.

Leviticus: Yeah, it was the burrito I ate.  No disturbance in the force here.

R2Mr.D2: BOOP! BOOP! BEEP! BEEP!

Leviticus: It doesn't smell THAT bad!  Now let's go!  We have to find Emperor God and Darth Emperor's Bitch before they steal The SCW Adrenaline Championship!

R2Mr.D2: BEEP! BOOP!

Leviticus: Shut your mouth, R2Mr.D2!

The two begin to walk further down the corridor.  Suddenly they are confronted by a horde of storm troopers!  All of these storm troopers have the initials "SCW" written on the back of their armor.  The lead trooper steps up.

Lead Trooper: STOP!

Another trooper stands next to him.

Trooper 1: Like, yeah, you need to totally stop and stuff, because, like you don't need to be here. In fact, I don't, like want to be here, either.  As if!

Lead Trooper: You need to go back!  Go away!  You can't have that SCW Adrenaline Championship!

Leviticus: And why not?

Lead Trooper: Because I need it to buy Cassidy new shoes...uh...I mean, um...I need to buy myself new armor! Yeah!

Trooper 1: I, like, look totally hot in my armor!  As if!

Leviticus: Hey, you wouldn't happen to be Ace Marshall, would you?

Trooper 1: Like, he totally is!  And I'm, totally, Maddi Cha...

The Lead Trooper holds a gloved hand over the other trooper's mouth.

Lead Trooper: Hush!  Don't listen to her, she's drunk.

Leviticus waves a hand over their eyes.

Leviticus: You will let us move along.

Lead Trooper: Like hell I will!

R2Mr.D2: BOOP! BOOP! BEEP! BOOP! BEEP!

Leviticus: Shut up, R2Mr.D2!  I am not an idiot!

He looks up at the Lead Trooper.

Leviticus: Uh...why don't we trade you?  My little insignificant friend here has some great new SCW Merchandise!

R2Mr.D2 hands Leviticus a Marcus Briggs "NOPE" t-shirt.

Leviticus: Like this "NOPE" t-shirt!

R2Mr.D2 hands Leviticus an oddly shaped object...

Levitiucs: A 3d Printed replica of Eyoshi's Ass!

R2Mr.D2 hands Leviticus a dilldo.

Leviticus: A Manvel Dildo that is ALWAYS Lubed!

R2Mr.D2 hands Leviticus a box of baby wipes.

Leviticus: Amy Chastaine Endorsed BABY WIPES!

R2Mr.D2 hands Leviticus another box...a computer more like it...

Levitiucs: The Bree Lancastar Fake Outrage Machine!

R2Mr.D2 hands Leviticus a snowglobe.

Leviticus: The Giovanni Aries Wonderland Snowglobe!

R2Mr.D2 hands Leviticus a wig.

Leviticus: The Selena Frost Hair Wig for when Regan Street fucks you up!  And speaking of Regan...

R2Mr.D2 hands Leviticus a bag.

Leviticus: Regan Street Kitty Litter!

R2Mr.D2: BEEP! BEEP! BEEEP!

Leviticus: What?  I didn't forget anything did I?

R2Mr.D2 suddenly sprays Leviticus with a white liquid.

Leviticus: Oh...yeah...Cookie's Milk.

The Lead Trooper shakes his head.

Lead Trooper: I shouldn't but....you know....that milk looks kinda tasty...

Leviticus: WHAT?!

Lead Trooper: Yeah, if that robot thingy stays behind and gives us another sample, we'll let you pass.

Leviticus: DEAL!

R2Mr.D2: BEEP! BOOP!

Leviticus: Sorry, pal!

Leviticus rushes off, past the storm troopers, and further down the corridor.  Eventually he reaches a door which eventually opens.  Sitting there in a chair is a very poor-ass attempt at a Chad Evans impersonator with a cloak on.

Leviticus: Emperor God, I presume.

Emperor God: What's it to you?

Leviticus: I want that Adrenaline Championship!  Now!

Before Emperor God can answer there's some heavy breathing.  Leviticus notices a female walking out of the shadows.  This is also a very poor impersonation, this time of Lexi, wearing a black cape.

Leviticus: Darth Lexi?

Darth Emperor's Bitch: NO!  Darth Emperor's Bitch!


TO BE CONTINUED!

In the next episode, these questions will be answered:

Will Mr. D change his mind and bring back The Women's Title?

Will People Buy The Brand New Samantha Raine Shampoo and Body Wash?

Will Anyone Remember Where Leviticus Left The Key That Lets That Short Guy Out of the R2Mr.D2 Costume?

Will Maddi Chase complete a sentence without the word "like" in it?

Did the "Bring Trinity Street Back To SCW" Petition gain enough signatures and would Mr. D even give a damn anyway?

Does Jason Helms have any plans to dress up as any other wildlife?